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sabineDownwood made me new icons. I love them. They rock.
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I think I nearly qualify as dead. I'm utterly exhausted in pretty much every way. I keep telling myself that I'll get through this day and then there's only one more before I fly home and have a day and a half to lounge around, then two days of work, then I get to see my sister, two good friends, and go to faire with a whole posse of people.
It doesn't help. Truthfully, it makes me want to curl up under the table in a little ball and shake. I'm so tired of being around People. I've spent more time in this damn room than the rest of my trip all put together. I'm stressed and worn through and through. My public mask is starting to fray and chip around the edges; my back has returned to how it felt before I left grad school and started chiropractic care.
There has been lots of shouting, tons of stress, hours of boredom, and several tidal waves of panic. When things go wrong, they go REALLY wrong and need to be fixed As Quickly As Humanly Possible. I've learned a lot in a hurry, solved some things that would have made me cry a month ago, and stood up for myself in a nasty confrontation.
There have been spots of brightness. I got to meet both Bri and Jenn - two Amazingly Fabulous People Who I Wish I Lived Closer To. I've had some amazing meals: sushi, pasta, a chocolate dessert that made an entire day worth living, and some very tasty BBQ. I'm going out to dinner with a coworker tomorrow night and then to the Dallas Lush store, which fills me with no small amount of glee.
I want quiet. I want peace. I want to not have to be cooped up in this basement. I want to see my Downwood and check on my dog - she's been throwing up and very sick the last few days and I'm very, very worried about her. I want to finish KT's bodice and get one put together that I've had the pieces sitting around for a year. I want to cook something healthy. I want to sleep and not wake up to an alarm. I want to drive around and not swelter.
77 hours down. 14 to go. I think I can do this, but it's really taking its toll. I might be pushing the August deadline back a bit longer. It really depends.
I'm tired.
-------
I think I nearly qualify as dead. I'm utterly exhausted in pretty much every way. I keep telling myself that I'll get through this day and then there's only one more before I fly home and have a day and a half to lounge around, then two days of work, then I get to see my sister, two good friends, and go to faire with a whole posse of people.
It doesn't help. Truthfully, it makes me want to curl up under the table in a little ball and shake. I'm so tired of being around People. I've spent more time in this damn room than the rest of my trip all put together. I'm stressed and worn through and through. My public mask is starting to fray and chip around the edges; my back has returned to how it felt before I left grad school and started chiropractic care.
There has been lots of shouting, tons of stress, hours of boredom, and several tidal waves of panic. When things go wrong, they go REALLY wrong and need to be fixed As Quickly As Humanly Possible. I've learned a lot in a hurry, solved some things that would have made me cry a month ago, and stood up for myself in a nasty confrontation.
There have been spots of brightness. I got to meet both Bri and Jenn - two Amazingly Fabulous People Who I Wish I Lived Closer To. I've had some amazing meals: sushi, pasta, a chocolate dessert that made an entire day worth living, and some very tasty BBQ. I'm going out to dinner with a coworker tomorrow night and then to the Dallas Lush store, which fills me with no small amount of glee.
I want quiet. I want peace. I want to not have to be cooped up in this basement. I want to see my Downwood and check on my dog - she's been throwing up and very sick the last few days and I'm very, very worried about her. I want to finish KT's bodice and get one put together that I've had the pieces sitting around for a year. I want to cook something healthy. I want to sleep and not wake up to an alarm. I want to drive around and not swelter.
77 hours down. 14 to go. I think I can do this, but it's really taking its toll. I might be pushing the August deadline back a bit longer. It really depends.
I'm tired.
