cleverly disguised as a responsible adult

The "winners" of the 2006 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest have been announced.

Q: What is this contest about?
A: How badly can you write while sounding like you're trying to write well.
Q: Where did this contest originate?
A: From the same place Snoopy got his inspiration:

"It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents--except at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the housetops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness."
--Edward George Bulwer-Lytton, Paul Clifford (1830)

The winning entry:
Detective Bart Lasiter was in his office studying the light from his one small window falling on his super burrito when the door swung open to reveal a woman whose body said you've had your last burrito for a while, whose face said angels did exist, and whose eyes said she could make you dig your own grave and lick the shovel clean.
Jim Guigli
Carmichael, CA


For more painful hilarity, read the rest of the winning entries.
http://www.sjsu.edu/depts/english/2006.htm

Shamelessly stolen from revrb

Recommend to me:

1. a movie
2. a book
3. a musical artist, song, or album
4. a LiveJournal user not on my friends list
5. what I should have for dinner
6. a website
7. a quote

...and put it in a comment and then put this in your journal.



If you read this and don't comment, I'll let sugar-crazed toaster varmints loose in your room. Don't think that I won't. I'm serious this time. *tapping foot impatiently* Well, what are you waiting for?